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40 Funny Horse Quotes and Sayings

40 Funny Horse Quotes and Sayings

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The world of horses has inspired a remarkable array of funny horse quotes and sayings that encapsulate the humor, joy, and sometimes unpredictable nature of these majestic creatures.

As we delve into this compilation, we’ll explore the amusing perspectives offered by horse lovers, enthusiasts, and even the horses themselves, providing you with a lighthearted look into horse-related humor.

Whether you’re a seasoned equestrian or just someone who appreciates a good laugh, these funny horse quotes promise to gallop straight into your heart.

Funny Horse Quotes

If you are a horse rider, the number one thing to do is … marry money!

How to ride a horse: Step One – Mount the horse. Step Two – Stay mounted …

It is a lot like nut and bolts – if the rider’s nuts, the horse bolts!

If you want a stable relationship, get a horse.

Tell a gelding, ask a mare and discuss with a stallion. Pray if it is a pony.

Owning horses is perfect for people who never want to sleep in ever again.

Forget the prince, I’ll take the horse.

Horses: much better than people.

I never fall off. I dismount with style.

Horses are only afraid of two things: 1. Things that move. 2. Things that don’t move.

There’s no feeling in the world that compares to have 16 hands between your legs.

Hey, girl. No, I meant ‘hay girl.’ That is your job, isn’t it?

If you are not a humble person, your horse will make you one.

Funny horse riding quotes and sayings
LacoKozyna /

Life is so much better in riding boots.

I wasn’t born in a barn, but I got there as fast as I could.

Buy me horses and tell me I’m pretty.

Dirt is cowgirl glitter.

Funny horse quotes continue…

Be wary of the horse with a sense of humor.

Pam Brown

When life gets bumpy…start posting!

Easily distracted by horses.

For instant happy, just add horse.

‘You must be rich because you have a horse.’ ‘No, I’m poor because I have a horse’

Things I am thankful for: 1. My horse 2. All of the other stuff.

Sometimes I just need my horse time.

I used to have money, now I have horses.

Whoever said diamonds are a girl’s best friend never owned horses.

Never squat with your spurs on.

Will Rogers

Horses are God’s way of apologizing for men.

Catherine the Great

Hold onto what makes you happy. If it tries to buck you off just hold on even tighter.

Grooming: the process by which dirt is transferred from your horse to you.

No, I don’t need a knight in shining armor. I am perfectly capable of riding my own horse.

Horses first. The rest later.

You don’t scare me I ride a mare.

Woman laughing with her horse on the beach
Olga Gauri /

Horse girls: easy to love and hard to afford.

The hardest thing about learning to ride is the ground!

One man’s wrong lead is another man’s counter-canter.

S.D. Price

Horses keep me stable.

Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy horses which is the same thing.

My horse and I have a lot in common. We’re both broke.

There is more to life than horses…there are ponies too!

Also Read: 45 Funny Horse Jokes & Puns

Sienna Jones

Monday 14th of November 2022

I absoloutly love this i used one for a HPE assesment about risks lol